Med Evac

So, after spending the week before the holidays in the Peace Corps Office in Managua, I had a serious sit-down with the PCMO who was handling my file. What had started out as a day-trip to Esteli for the Va Pues magazine meeting had turned into a second round of the inexplicable rash I got a little less than a week ago. So, the good news is that it means I am probably not allergic to Cipro, but the PCMOs admit that there is really nothing else they can medically do in Nicaragua. And thus the discussion began about Medically Evacuating me home to the States to get checked out. Just to clarify, MedEvac means you are sent to DC or your Home of Record and you have 45 days to recover and get medically cleared to return to service. This protocol is meant for Volunteers in all sorts of situations, normally much more serious (broken bones, serious surgery, etc.), but the PCMOs also discussed the practicality of giving the body 100% chance of getting back to a baseline of health. And then I got another bacterial infection while here this week in Managua....which decided it.

Dad and Sean are still coming and we are still going to enjoy the Holiday Week as much as my health will allow, but I will also be packing and organizing my things in case the evacuation turns into a medical separation. The PCMOs have been incredibly supportive and helpful in getting all the information and paperwork set-up and staying positive. They have been very honest about the various moods that go along with Med Evac. The Assistant Director for the whole PCNicaragua also sat down with me and regaled me with 2-3 other stories of Volunteers who had been fine during all of Training and been completely prepared for site and their service and then could not acclimate to the new climate or for whatever reason, spent the first year of their service too miserable to be effective. "You're not the first, and you will certainly not be the last, and there is no shame in taking care of your body." Thanks Miguel!

Since Peace Corps has been my dream job since I was in high school, and even though it is just an evacuation, it's still a blow. There is a small sense of relief, knowing that it's not just me and that I used all my options available in country. There is also disappointment and a little anger that my body does not seem to be able to get used to my site when other Volunteers don't have problems (or just don't say anything). There is also anger with my site and community, as it is most likely the contaminated water and food that is playing a critical role in this whole thing. There is also overall sadness (that I am getting better about accepting) in that i was just getting warmed up to living on my own and settling into a routine while getting projects set up for later in the New Year. While these may still happen, it is like being thrown into a limbo similar to waiting for my Peace Corps post. I am also anxious that as of right now I haven't had a lot of overwhelming positive experiences in my site (in part because I haven't been in my site that often), so I don't feel I have a resounding reason to go back. However, I have probably spent equal amounts of time in site and in Managua, which is not efficient or effective for getting projects done that require building trust and personal relationships. Hard as it is to admit, Peace Corps is also only 27 months, and I would rather not damage my immune system in the long-run. And there is still the basic fact that I have no idea what is making me sick, which means that if I don't go home, I will returning to a place that I do know will continue to make me sick. That just doesn't seem very smart. But one step at a time.....